DAY 86 - Smell The Coffee But Don’t Drink It

My son, Kenn, got me addicted to the stuff. I am not suggesting that he meant to. It was all quite loving and innocent. Returning from a year in Costa Rica, he brought gifts for his sister, his mom and me. I have no memory of what they got, but I remember mine; it changed my life.

As a child, I was attracted to things my parents, and other adults did. I wanted to smoke, and drink coffee. But, the coffee tasted so bad, and the smoking is for another story.

I did not drink coffee, ever, until age 43, the summer of 1995. Even then, it was not with relish; I was just trying to be gracious in accepting the gift that my son had brought from Costa Rica. The gift had 2 parts; a couple of pounds of coffee beans, and a rudimentary drip-coffee maker constructed of a simple cloth bag hung from a piece of heavy, twisted wire that was stuck in a small flat piece of wood.

Things started out slowly. I could only make one cup at a time with the bag on a wire. For the first year, or so, I would make a cup every other day. Before long it was daily; and then more than one cup per day. I graduated to a French press, allowing me to make 4 cups at a time. I was hooked. I even liked it.

So now, its December 29, 2010, and I have a sense that coffee may not be doing me good. I wonder if it is making my knee worse. It certainly wires me at times. I need to take a break, do an experiment, and remove coffee from my diet for a while. During December I have considered setting a date and going cold-turkey for a month. Some days I thought I would do it. Some days I didn’t think I could face it.

Today, with Gail’s help (a patient off-of-coffee), I am in; I’m public. I will be 100% off of coffee from January 1 until midnight of January 31st. Should be an interesting ride.

Anybody going to join me on the 31 days without?  Post your YES or NO to the comments at the end of this book/blog post.

Could you do it? It is not a healthy sign when a food or drink owns you.

DAY 65 - The Holiday Season is About Comfort and Joy: Not Judgment

There is no question that we all need comfort in our lives. A little joy would be great too. But, at the very least, we all need comfort. What makes us feel comfortable, and where do we go if we don’t?

Comfort comes from different sources. Physically it comes from sufficient nutrition, water, air, exercise, sleep, and shelter. Emotionally it comes from loving relationships, and from how we feel about ourselves. Spiritually it may come from a sense of connection to all things, or a belief in a higher power.

If one generally experiences comfort in one’s life, then all is well. But it is obvious that many people are not comfortable in their lives and so strive to find comfort.

Unfortunately the source of discomfort in one’s life may not be clear. Discomfort may come from poor nutrition, lack of sleep or exercise, insufficient connection with others, a sense that one is not worthy, or from a spiritual void. There may be more than one contributor, and it is often not a simple process to understand what factors stand in the way of comfort.

The following is a short list of things that are often used to temporarily provide comfort: drugs (street and prescription), alcohol, television, exercise, sex, work, video gaming, internet surfing, shopping, reading, and food. The excessive use of any of these is usually referred to as an addiction. Addictive behaviors predictably harm the addict, and those around them. I believe it is accurate to say that addictions are primarily an attempt to find comfort.

Out of compassion, and to avoid looking the fool, we are wise not to judge others in regard to their addictive behavior. Our culture generally supports referring to individuals whose lives are caught up in the abuse of drugs or alcohol, as “losers”. But then, how might we refer to the millions of Americans who are caught up in eating excessively, or eating in an imbalanced fashion, not unlike an addict, harming themselves and others through the resulting conditions of overweight, obesity, diabetes, heart attack, stroke, dementia, depression, and other serious conditions? I would suggest that we might refer to them as people in need of comfort.

Regardless of our addictions, none of us really need to be judged. What we really need is to be loved, to understand the source of our discomfort, and to create true comfort.

Imagine no ‘losers” in the New Year; only individuals desiring comfort.

DAY 45 – Sugar Makes for a Lousy Gift

I just wanted to dash this off to you cuz I know that we are already deep into the “Holiday Season”.

Don’t think it is lost on me that the word “holiday” comes from “holy”, and that “holy” means “sacred”; but it is more than apparent that in America, holidays are mostly about gifts. You didn’t ask for my advice, but you don’t have to read this either, and I am speaking to the universal “you” anyway; so here goes. Sugar is a lousy gift.

Let me count the ways:

First off, don’t you want to give something unique and possibly personalized? Sugar is not unique; it is ubiquitous! No matter the form or the flavor, it is still just sugar; and folks eat that every single day; hardly special.

Many people admit to being addicted to sugar. Many of those same people say that they really want to stay away from the stuff. Do you give booze to your alcoholic family and friends? Me neither.

Sugar makes people sick; that’s not a hypothesis, it’s a fact. Consider a few of the major diseases that disable and kill Americans and that are known to be fueled by excessive sugar: heart disease, cancer, diabetes, depression, obesity, and dementia. Obviously you aren’t wishing any of those on your loved-ones. But, are you facilitating them?

Obesity and overweight are talked about so much in our culture, that most of us are numb to the real meaning. The real meaning is that 2/3 of American adults (age 20-74) are either overweight or obese and are therefore seriously, or significantly unwell. Sugar plays a powerful role in this dangerous condition of our citizenry and of our Country. Disease and danger are not gifts.

It is both common, and understandable, that many people feel that to give sugar on a “special occasion” is perfectly reasonable. In fact, to question sugar gifts on “special occasions”, while historically would have been considered un-American, in today’s social climate, might now be considered terrorism. But back to the point; given that adults stop for sugared drinks each day on their way to work, and kids start their days with Pop Tarts, there is no way to imagine sugar being consumed just on “special occasions”. We are actually not far from a continuous IV drip (intravenous).

Your one little sugar gift does make a difference. Millions are giving one or more little sugar gifts.

It is not my intent to make your “holidays” more difficult than they may already be. I sincerely hope that the opportunity to consider the clear and present danger of sugar is a gift for you during this beautiful time of year.

PS – My wonderful wife suggests that I include the disclaimer/clarifier that I eat sugar. She’s right!   

Additionally, I am not judging those who give or eat sugar gifts. I am simply trying to address critical issues of our time in the hope of reducing suffering. It’s a tricky, if not scary job for me.